HW # 58 Parenting 102

Part 3: Interviews

From what I've heard about my brother's early childhood, I think my parents and Marguerite had similar parenting styles. My brother, who is 6 1/2 years older than I am, was pretty hyperactive. When he was little his teacher said that the classroom could barely contain him. He was always ready to race to the playground. The head of his school wanted to put him on a drug to calm him down. My parents wouldn't allow it. They didn't yell at him. Instead they helped him develop his two big talents, sports and art. They put him in a basketball program at Basketball City when he was only 3 or 4 years old. My mother took him to an art program at the Brooklyn Museum starting at age 3.
I bet Marguerite would've done the same thing. She said that being a parent means making sacrifices like taking the time to figure out what kids need and then finding a way to give them the right experiences. By focusing my brother on what he wanted to do, my parents say he learned how to control his body and not be so wild. He also developed skills really early so that he was able to get a lot of confidence and get better and better at doing the things he loved to do. I think Mr.Marks would do something similar with his son. He said he would develop his interests. I think this means that instead of giving him too much discipline, he will try to get his son to follow his own interests which means learning how to discipline yourself to get better at whatever it is you like doing.

Part 4: Insights on Parenting

When it comes to my own experience about how my parents raised me when I was little. I only remember the end of this little story I am about to tell. First of all, I went to preschool when I was 4 months old. My mom had worked for a French organization when my brother was born that let her have a whole year of maternity leave. By the time I was born she worked for Public Radio which only gave 3 months of maternity leave. When I was about a year old, the head of the preschool told my parents that I should have my hearing tested. It turned out that I was severely deaf in both ears. I had to wait until I was 4 1/2 years old to have an operation that my parents were told would have a 50% chance of restoring my hearing. I learned to lip read, but I didn't speak well because I couldn't hear the sounds that 2 year olds need to hear to learn how to speak. The operation was successful but I had to have 3 years of speech therapy. I took a test for kindergarden, and my parents were told that I had some mental retardation. My mother told me that she did not get upset. She just told the New York City Department of Education that she did not believe it. It turned out that after a thousand meetings and more testing I was allowed to go to a regular public school at the right grade level. I just had to have a lot of speech therapy. At the same time my parents helped me develop the interests I had which were roller blading, soccer, baseball, basketball, and art.

If I were to ever have children, based on how my parents coped with my problems at an early age, I will know how to teach them how to overcome their misfortunes. The primary rule that I have learned from my parents' experience with me is to discover a child's interests, then develop those interests until they become talents that he/she can use for the rest of his/her life. Fortunately, I had interests that my parents helped me develop that allowed me to become a more well-rounded individual. When I was going through speech therapy at a very young age, my speech sounded "different" and I was mocked for my lack of proper enunciation. At that same time my parents took me and my brother to Basketball City on weekends where I learned to play with the help of the likes of Teresa Wetherspoon and Stephon Marbury. I used the skills I learned at Basketball City in my gym class where I could dominate my mean classmates in games like "horse", "Utah", and even full court "5 on 5." This is how I learned the word "confidence," which is something that cannot be taught but can only be built up. I thank my parents and brother for that.